Timber...

Not much going on the past few days.  Earlier this week, Jonah and I got a scooter and I named it "Chloe".  I usually don't name my vehicles, but found it appropriate with this one.  Our first adventure on Chloe was to downtown.  Most of the yoga students here avoid the downtown area.  The downtown area is the worst area to be in.  The chaos that happens downtown is undescribable.  There are people everywhere, cars, buses and scooters all trying to one up each other and the pollution is heavy.  As part of my initiation, we went there first.  I figured that if I can ride through downtown, I can ride anywhere.  We made it through unscathed.  Jonah was surprised with my aggressive driving skills and I also surprised myself.  After riding on the back of the scooter with Christian, I picked up on the temperament of the drivers.  Cutting someone off is part of the driving culture here.  As long as you drive defensively and slightly aggressive, no one messes with you.  Jonah and I do get a lot of funny looks though.  It is weird for the people here to see a male westerner as a passenger and the woman as the driver.  It also doesn't help that we gloat about the situation.

As of today, I have 16 days left.  I still can't decide whether I want to travel further or go home.  I have to make a decision this week and for some reason I'm a bit torn about the whole thing.  Right now, feeling irresponsible is my only reason for wanting to go home.  At some point, I need to get back on track and do something about my life and earn a living.  My dilemma is that once I start my life back up again, when will I have the opportunity to travel extensively as this opportunity now.  My rational is that it will be the holidays and most companies will not be hiring.  For my own sanity purposes, I cannot be home and be unemployed for very long.  In a sense, by staying here I'm avoiding the inevitable or stalling.  I wish the decision was easy as coming here.  By the end of the week, if I don't have a decision, I'm going to flip on-it and let a coin decide.

Practice today was a disaster.  I was tired and was unable to get into the rhythm (my light bulb just turned on: I just noticed that there are no vowels in the word 'rhythm'.  huh!).  I was exhausting every ounce of energy I had trying to get into the asanas.  My five count today was more like a 3 breath count.  When it came time to the finishing asanas, I knew I would be in trouble with Sirshasana (headstand).  Before I was in the asana, I projected that I was going to fall over today.  I got up once and was fine.  Didn't feel like I held it long enough, so I tried again.  Going up, I knew my head and shoulders (not the shampoo) weren't balanced and I went up anyway.  To avoid smashing my fingers, I fell to the side.  By this time, the majority of the class had left and I had a lot of room on all sides.  No one was hurt in the process, but I did have a witness that saw the whole thing.  One of my friends in class was in Sirshasana and facing my direction.  She has seen me fall before, but after I fell I had no energy to roll myself over.  I laid on the carpet sideways laughing.  If I were my friend and I witnessed something like my acrobatic performance, I would have probably fallen over laughing.